Eight was Enough is a story of a Christian family who felt called upon by God to adopt 5 children in addition to their 3 biological children. I enjoyed this story and as someone who reads lots of adoption and fostering memoirs, there were things I loved and a few that made me a bit uneasy. I completely connected with the author fairly early on in the story, as she felt God spoke to her about her destiny to adopt, I have had a similar feeling for most of my life, though I’ve never attributed it to God. I think that her and her husband’s willingness to accept children (and adults) as members of their family at a moments notice is very special and this is definitely a story worth sharing!
I’m not a huge fan of very Christian books because I find that sometimes things get a little weighed down with gospels and quotes from the bible and so going in to this novel, knowing it was Christian (it has god in the subtitle after all!) I did have to keep in mind that this was the style of writing the author was going for. I think if you enjoy Christian stories and are practicing religion this book will be totally fine and if you’re further down the spectrum from me and can’t handle a Christian book then this is likely not the book for you. I said earlier that I am a huge fan of adoption and foster memoirs and I would say I’m fairly well versed in this sub nonfiction genre. There were a few things about this book that didn’t sit well with me in comparison to the way other authors handle these types of things. First, the book starts and ends with the author explaining that she does not want to be questioned about her decisions related transracial adoptions. She explains using statistics that the number of black children in foster care vs the number of black parents looking to adopt is very skewed. While in some ways I agree - don’t force a child to be in long term foster care when a family desperately wants them but isn’t the same ethnicity, I feel a bit like this was her way of justifying why she is the right parent for these children. She also explains that she learned how to do cornrows (better than a black woman at her church) so she will take fine care of her black children even though she is white. I’m glad she did learn that but I’m not sure that constitutes the cultural education her children needed. And considering the fact that 4/5 of her adoptive children struggled as they became adults, I think there might have been room for more effort towards cultural education, and community/identity exploration for her bio family and her adopted children. Second, I feel really uneasy with the way that she handled the mental health challenges two of her adopted children face. I’m not naive, I know that if I one day adopt, it’s not going to be easy, no matter what I do my best intentions will probably not be enough for my future children and there will be huge bumps. Two of her children were referred to by their siblings as the “terrible twins” and both children went on to get diagnoses and spend time dealing with in and out patient psych treatments, become young parents and deal with addictions and crime. In other adoption memoirs this challenge as the children become young adults is often present, and the author handles it in many different ways. This author just left me feeling uneasy about her feelings toward the choices her children made and how this was very much their problems to solve when really they probably needed significant support. Perhaps more information about what the family did to support and prepare for these unexpected but really common adoption problems may have eased some of my discomfort with the way these stories unfolded. I commend this family for helping children in need and for sharing their private lives in an opportunity to inspire and teach others. I am so glad I got to read this book and learn about this family and their story. Right now the book is free** on Amazon (kindle edition) so if my review left you interested, you should go grab it while it is free!
Please note: I received an advance review copy for free through book sirens, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
**Free at date of posting: March 13, 2022 - I'm not sure how long this book will be free and I don't have any control over Amazon/Kindle/The Publisher's pricing, just something I noticed today while I was on Amazon